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Weekly Awesome 4.18

April 18, 2012

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~Stuff I pinned on my TIAW, Wisdom, and Stuff That’s Wrong boards.
~OK, so, this isn’t about a woman, but a lot of what Kevin Smith says reflects what I hear women say. On the whole the article is extremely relevant in the movement to end size discrimination. “Racism and sexism will get you ostracised in more enlightened communities, but you can mock fat people all you want.” (PS. For the record, I hear this kind of issue out of Southwest Airlines ALL.THE.TIME.)
~Another one from a guy – this time a message to women. Listen to him, beautiful ladies, he’s RIGHT.
~When my younger daughter was about four years old, she stood in our kitchen, pulled up her shirt and popped her tummy straight out. It was impressive, that round little belly. I smiled, and she grinned back. “That’s as cute as I can make it,” she said proudly. <--That is just too perfect. We should all take a cue from that little girl. Read the rest here.
~The Fat Girl’s Guide to Being Irresistible – Even To Yourself. Although, frankly, this advice works for any-size girls. And, you know what? I say this stuff all the time and I post stuff that says it all the time. And I will keep doing it until it sinks in to every woman’s heart.
~This article proposes that real women have curves – even the skinny women. And the real point here is to stop arguing and stand together as WOMEN. Just as women. Beautiful, amazing, strong, soft, gentle, fiery women.
~Vegans can be chubby, too. Sometimes it’s more (or different) than diet.
~Yet another example of perfectly good airtime going to pick apart a celebrity’s body rather than, say, real issues of the world. Jessica Simpson is beautiful and her weight just isn’t anyone’s business.
~Oh wait. Another one of those. This time about Paula Deen. (And, yes, it’s been sitting in my “Articles I may post someday” queue for quite awhile.)
~This article, by a young mother, asks “When did it stop being acceptable for a woman to have children before a career if she wanted to?” <–This strikes me as applicable to The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf. Women today are required to be homemakers, to have careers, and to be beautiful and young always. That’s an awful lot to ask of anyone and someday women are going to crack under the pressure. We must, instead, choose to love ourselves exactly as we are, and to live our lives exactly as WE want. And if that means homemaking, or a career, or children at 20 or no children ever – that’s OK. Because you are amazing just as you are. And so am I. And so are we all. Have an awesome week!

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6 Responses to “Weekly Awesome 4.18”

  1. janet Says:
    April 19th, 2012 at 8:27 am

    In regards to the cartoon, while I get the point its trying to make there certainly is a degree of self-respect associated with sleeping around. The cartoon trivializes our own special bodies and the connection emotional and physical connection of self-respect.

    Of course a lot of people don’t seem to understand is that self-respect is not purely about sleeping around all in of itself, and certainly not limited to just women. And yes some men will even make comments like that to feel like they have control of the woman howeer I think most men (and women alike) say these sort of comments because they do understand that there is some connection between the two.

    Generally when people sleep around, throw themselves at others (not jsut physically but emotionally as well) it is due to an inner void. A lack of self worth and a need to feel boosted up and loved by someone who “wants” them.

    Unfortunatly many people they encounter don’t want them as a person but want them for selfish reasons of what they can get for themselves (be it sex, someone to do their cleaning for them, be a backup when they are bored, or whatever.) and in the end this only increases their lonliness and feelings of disrespect for themself.

    Learnign how to differentiate and share yourself (whether physically or emotionally) with good, healthy people, who really care about your well being is important to everyone. I feel the cartoon minimalizes the importance of teaching children (and helping many adults) understand that distinction, and develop self-respect for themself.

  2. Bonnie (TIAW) Says:
    April 19th, 2012 at 10:18 am

    When a person uses the phrase “self-respect” AT someone else, the way it shows in the cartoon, it’s really just a socially acceptable way of saying, “I don’t respect you.” I feel the cartoon’s point isn’t to delve into layers of *actual* self-respect, but to point out that what a woman does with her vagina is none of anyone else’s business. No one gets to judge. Why women do what they do is an entirely different discussion and really can only be approached in a place of full respect for everyone. So no matter which angle I see this from, I find the cartoon valid and relevant.

  3. I, Sparrow Says:
    April 23rd, 2012 at 7:52 am

    I read the Real Women Have Curves article, and I completely understand what the author is trying to do. She has great motives and I agree with her agenda. That said, I don’t think “real women have curves” is the best slogan to use for what she is trying to accomplish. Language is a weighty, loaded thing and “curves” in relation to women has always had a very specific meaning. Would larger women like a similar campaign for women of all shapes and sizes to embrace their bodies if the slogan was “Real Women Have Hip Bones”? Because, you know…ALL women have bones, after all. Also, that curve between your neck and collar bone the author uses as evidence that all women do, in fact, have curves? Anyone with a neck has that. In other words, men and women and children and pretty much every human. I think we need to stop trying to use shape words (and “curve” does indicate shape, wherever on the body one intends it to be pertinent) to bring us all together. In fact, the whole attempt to try to find a pithy phrase to embody what a “real woman” is, is starting to fall flat for me. Real women not only come in so many shapes, but have so many different beliefs, values, behaviors, handicaps, occupations, concerns, languages, etc., that I don’t think we can ever all be described together by a single phrase. Why do we need to be? Why do we WANT to be?

  4. Bonnie (TIAW) Says:
    April 23rd, 2012 at 9:27 am

    Yes, I think I agree with all that, Sparrow.

  5. I, Sparrow Says:
    April 23rd, 2012 at 12:47 pm

    Perhaps we need something that we can say for ourselves rather than something said OF women in the third person. A declaration rather than a description. Something regarding our identity at such a basic level that we need no qualifiers. “We ARE real women.” Full stop.

    Each of us, no matter our size, shape, religion, or lifestyle, can determine for ourselves what it is that makes us “real” and what it is that makes us “woman” and simply claim, “I am a real woman.” Maybe it’s not necessary to get any more specific than that.

  6. Bonnie (TIAW) Says:
    April 23rd, 2012 at 1:56 pm

    Love. Simplicity is sometimes the best.

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