Source: fuckyeahdementia.com via Bonnie on Pinterest
.
~Stuff I pinned on my TIAW board.
~Have you seen that video about gay guys marrying chicks to, like, get back at straight guys for not supporting gay marriage or something? There have been a couple of response videos. Thing is? When you put all these videos together it turns into a discussion by everyone else about who we get to marry. It makes it feel like women are, once again, just an item to be bargained for. Ugh.
~For many years now I’ve been wary of complimenting someone on their weight loss. I didn’t fully understand why until I started doing all this work here with you guys and over at SOAM. But it boils down to the fact that complimenting someone on their weight loss is adding my voice to the Thin-is-Better ideology. It is one thing to compliment someone on working hard to make changes that are healthy for their whole lifestyle, and another entirely different thing to comment on a smaller size without having any information about how they arrived there. Guess what? You are beautiful no matter what you weigh. Really. This post is long, but beautifully written.
~Gender-specific toy marketing has come up a lot lately, undoubtedly because the Season For Shopping is well upon us now. But it’s not just us grownups getting in a tizzy over this. The little ones are just as upset (only they are, perhaps, more adorable about it).
~Rape in South Africa: the vaginas fight back. I love this bit: “When critics complained that it was a medieval punishment, Ehlers replied tersely, ‘A medieval device for a medieval deed.'”
~20+ examples of thin privilege.
December 5th, 2012 at 7:38 pm
there is also a “Lesbians will marry your boyfriends” video.
December 5th, 2012 at 8:18 pm
I’ve lost 25 pounds in the last two years. I was 145 lbs, had a baby, separated from my husband, moved out of the country (and back in with my parents), and was diagnosed with ADHD. I didn’t gain any weight with the pregnancy (stress and poverty – woohoo, what a diet plan!), lost 10 with the birth, lost another 5 slowly over a year or so, and lost another 10 in the last three months as a side effect of my medication.
So, here I am, wearing a size 6 for the first time in my adult life. And discovering that, although I thought I was happy with my size all that time, somewhere in the back of my mind I was still under the impression that thin people had it better. That thinner women had more confidence, could wear nicer clothes, had an easier time putting an outfit together and spent less time adjusting them during the day, didn’t have to *THINK* about their bodies as much as I apparently did.
And you know what? It isn’t true. I still have a hell of a time finding affordable clothes that I like and that fit me well (hey, turns out that off-the-rack sucks universally! Go figure – we aren’t all proportioned exactly to some set standard). I still spend a ton of time adjusting my clothing and thinking about my body. I’m as self-conscious as ever. Sure, I worry less about muffin top and more about saggy breasts (why did they have to lose weight too?), less about my chubby face and more about not having enough ass to fill out my jeans. Insecurity is an equal opportunity tormentor. :-p
And I’ve learned to hate compliments that focus on my weight. I didn’t work to lose this weight – I wasn’t overweight before! My life went to hell, and along the way my appetite disappeared. I’m breastfeeding and that sucks calories. But I’m not healthier now. I’m tired, and worried that I haven’t stopped losing weight, and I’ve started doing something I NEVER did before in my life – obsessing about food and my weight.
You know, I’ve been reading here and at SOAM for years, and I might just now be getting to where I feel like I have something to submit and a reason to submit it.