This is a Woman

30 years old

Growing up I was overweight but had very muscular legs.  I remember weighing 180lbs at 5ft 4in in 9th grade.  I was ok with my body but sometimes wished i weighed less.  I made myself a promise that i would not have sex until i felt good about my body.  I didnt want to need a man to feel good about my body.  In 200 I had got down to 160lbs and had lost the baby fat.  I had stretch marks and my little belly pouch but I looked good, and I was content.  Shortly after going on birth control then losing my job in 2003 i started to gain weight.  i was 200lbs.  by the time i got pregnant in 2007 (26years old) i weighted 220lbs.  I gained exactly 20lbs by the time i had him in november of 2007 via c section.  By the time i went to my 2 week checkup i was down to 212lbs and was so happy.  After that I went back to work and was getting stressed out, and started drinking and started gaining weight again.  when i stopped drinking and started watching what i eat and excercising, i still couldnt lose any weight.  In nov of 2009 I found out i was pregnant again.  I was excited but wasnt thrilled about starting my pregnancy at 250lbs.  I miscarried at about 6 weeks pregnant.  Then in feb of 2010 i found out i was pregnant again.  Again i miscarried at 5 weeks.  Finally i was able to go see a doctor in june of 2010.  When i got there i told the doctor i was a week late for my period.  i had only had one period since my second miscarriage and my period before that was always 28 days at 10am.  it was that exact.  the doctor told me i hadnt started because i had gain so much weight. I wasnt happy with that remark because i had been stuck at 250lbs since 2008.  They ended up doing a blood test that wednesday to see what might have been causing my miscarriages.  on that friday i got a call, it was my thyroid that was slow and making me sleeping, and not able to lose weight.  They called in a prescription for me and i went to get it.  I decided i would start it that next day however, saturday i decided to take a test just to see and it was positive.  i called up the hospital to make sure it was ok to take the medicine and they said yes.  If had i hadnt started it, i probably wouldve miscarried again.  When i started that pregnancy i was 252lbs.  when i had my little boy in feb of 2011 i weight only 258lbs.  i was very pleased that i didnt gain to much.  when i went back to my 2 week appointment i weighted 231lbs.  i was very very excited.  I have since got down to 224lbs and am trying to lose a little more weight not because i dont like how i look but because i got clothes that are size 16 and im size 18 and cant afford to buy new clothes.  However if i dont go down i am very happy with my body.  i got stretch marks all over my belly.  with my second pregnancy i got stretch marks on my little pouch for getting smaller and the upper part of my stomach i got stretch marks for getting bigger.

first picture is me about 34 weeks pregnant with my first son

second is me in 2008

third is of me 9 weeks pregnant with second son

fourth is me  6 months pregnant

fifth is of my two miracles

sixth is me posing in front of my camera with my oldest mocking me